"I say yes when I mean no and the wrinkle grows." - Naomi Shihab Nye
"There have been many times that I said yes when I meant no, afraid of displeasing others, and even more afraid of being viewed as selfish. I think the first time I decided to get married, I said yes when I meant no. Young and inexperienced at being myself, I agreed to be a fish out of water for as long as I could, so as not to hurt or disappoint or displease. Not surprisingly, it all ended badly.
And how many times, once trained in self-sacrifice, do we have the opposite conversation with ourselves; our passion for life saying yes, yes, yes, and our practical guardedness saying, don't be foolish, be realistic, don't leave yourself unprotected. But long enough on the journey, and we come to realize an even deeper aspect of all this: that those who truly love us will never knowingly ask us to be other than we are.
The unwavering truth is that when we agree to any demand, request, or condition that is contrary to our soul's nature, the cost is that precious life force is drained off our core. Despite the seeming rewards of compliance, our souls grow weary by engaging in activities that are inherently against their nature.
When we leave the crowded streets and watch any piece of nature doing what it does - tree, moose, snake, or lightning - it becomes clear that the very energy of life is the spirit released by things being what they are. And those of us committed to love must accept that care is the inner river flooding its banks. yet if the soul's river can't be fed by its source. there will be no care."
1. The fear of displeasing others leads us down the path of self-betrayal.
2. Self-betrayal (in any form) blocks you from your natural power. It leads to feeling drained and resentful. Self-betrayal sends a very clear and strong message that you are not worthy of being your real self.
It's this message of unworthiness that is the real reason why, after so much effort, you're still not reaching your goals.
3. Agreeing to being something you're not, agreeing to doing things that you don't want to do, always ends badly. Always.
4. Those people who live a truly rewarding and fulfilling life are wildly protective of their sacred time and energy. They are unwilling to exchange it for things that leave them drained.
5. The fastest way towards the life you really want begins with a serious dedication to your Self. Don't say yes when you really mean no. The cost of your soul growing weary is too high of a price to pay.
You've got big things to do with this life, remember?
Every single living creature (including me and you) is alive for only one reason: to learn how to be who they really are. Anything other than that, and we all lose out.