He made a list of what comes up for him when he's around a specific person in his life.
not being himself
You'd think after reading this list that it would be clear what move to make next. You might even think it would be kind of easy.
This is why it's not.
Because the place we make our decisions from has nothing to do with those things on the list. It's not the anxiety or the shame or the second guessing that's got the hold on us.
The real reason why breaking the habit of self-sabotage is so damn tricky is because the real force at play is always our story of deserving.
Letting go of something that no longer serves you forces you to step into a brand new place and being on foreign land can be pretty damn scary.
This is the reason why we hang onto habits that make us feel not so great. Even though it causes pain, it's also a pretty safe place to be. We don't have to travel somewhere new. We don't rock the boat of our longstanding life story.
Being able to give up some of your sabotaging ways requires a readiness to let yourself feel great.
The only way out of the darkness is to feel worthy of the light.
So I guess the choice becomes; what would you rather see? All the reasons why you're not good enough or how great your life could be?
If your 'not good enough' story is in the driver's seat of your life, you'll betray yourself in a million different ways.
You can be scared to let go, you can be scared to do it on your own, you can be afraid that you're going to somehow fail, that's perfect okay, but you can no longer make choices from this 'not good enough' place.
Now, as my Grandmother Ruth used to say, when we were trying to beat my Grandfather in a game of Spades, "let's show them what kind of trees make shingles, shall we?"
What move will you make today to let yourself feel great? Feel free to share with me below.